Poetry Pause is the League of Canadian Poets’ daily poetry dispatch. Read “natural selection” by dl clay.

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natural selection

By dl clay

i used to be her. the quiet child. willful or obedient, depending on who was saying. now, i am still quiet. i

like to think the quiet is thoughtful but sometimes it is just dreamy or emptied, all my thoughts fled into

the ether.

i used to be the woman next store, a child playing in a field, the teenager hiding in her bedroom. i used to

be open. i used to be overflowing. i tried to write it down. i used to wish i could draw. i used to wish i

could sing in the spotlight. i used to wish.

now i am. now i am.

i used to be small, hushed. now i am of medium height and make noise on paper.

i used to somersault, dance. now i have rhythm in my hands that works the clay.

now i am. now i am.

i used to defy my parents, friends, sometimes gravity. i used to be a bird with an aerial view. i used to be

a stone in a field.

i used to sing when alone – using the words of other people. now i have found my own words,

combinations strung together to wear or put in a drawer. i push and pull until a new birthing occurs. every

day i am someone else, venturing out into the world. every day i meet myself returning.

now i am.

now I am.

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Copyright © dl clay

“dl clay (Deb Clay) is a writer and artist living on Vancouver Island. In response to her mother’s dementia and her own aging, she has been exploring memory and what it is to remember. She is constantly exploring and experimenting with various media to fuel her art and writing. Deb has self-published two hand-bound chapbooks of poetry and mentored five group poetry chapbooks, each themed book made up of several writers. A coordinator of Sooke Writers’ Collective, she continues to help writers develop and publish.”

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